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Thirteen Things About The Season So Far…

April 14, 2014

The Giants have reached the totally arbitrary all-important 13 game mark, with a record of 8-5, good enough for second place in the NL West. It’s still April, so everything we’ve seen so far might mean nothing. Or it might mean everything. Baseball!

But let’s go ahead and draw some conclusions anyway, because this is a blog…

1. Last spring I wrote this

Madison Bumgarner will have the best season of any Giants pitcher, and it won’t be close Betting against Matt Cain is like, well, betting against Matt Cain, and I think Lincecum will rebound. But I’m picking this as the year Bumgarner asserts himself as the ace and stays in the Cy Young race to the end.

(Ignore the crossed out stuff in the middle; I don’t recall writing that at all.) Flash forward to this spring, when I wrote this

Brandon Belt is entering his age-26 season. He has shown marked, consistent improvement in each of his first three MLB seasons, after lighting it up on the farm. So predicting a good year, with modest statistical upticks across the board, ain’t exactly bold. But that beard. It’s doing funny things to my head. I’m seeing visions…

Belt has cooled down a bit, but he’s still on pace to hit 62 home runs. Conclusion: I am a prescient genius.

2. Hey, look, here’s something else I wrote before this season…

There’s [a] chance [Tim Lincecum] will emerge from his pitch-to-contact cocoon, spread his wings and fly off, a beautiful butterfly. That looks like Greg Maddux.



3. There’s something oddly comforting about watching Matt Cain lose 1-0, considering his struggles last season and his shaky start to 2014. It’s like a warm blanket. That your dog peed on.

4. Every time Brandon Crawford hits a walkoff home run, a guy with male-pattern baldness gets a hair back. Just one, but still.

5. Brandon Crawford is hitting .308/.417/.564. He did this last April, then stopped. It’d be cool if you didn’t stop, Brandon…just a thought.

6. Doesn’t it kind of seem like Tim Hudson has been a Giant all along?

7. I’ll admit to worrying a tad about the bullpen. There’s still time. And bullpens are like drunk gibbons behind the wheel of an F-250, but less predictable. Still, so far they’ve given up nine runs in 39 1/2 innings. It’d be cool if you didn’t stop, bullpen…just a thought.

8. In 2010 the Giants signed a 33-year-old clomper coming off a dreadful season, in the hopes that he’d bounce back and inject a little power. Several months later this happened…


I’m not saying Mike Morse is going to finish seventh in MVP voting and lead the Giants to a championship with the help of an inspirational undergarment. But I’m not not saying that.

9. I own two bobbleheads: a Brian Wilson and a Hunter-Pence-on-his-scooter. My kid has broken both. This feels like an omen, but I’m going with “coincidence.” (Also, “my kid breaks a lot of stuff.”)

10. When Madison Bumgarner hits a grand slam, a snot rocket gets its wings.

11. There’s a perverse part of me that hopes Sandoval doesn’t have a monster year, and is instead just a so-so player on an excellent team, so that his price tag stays in a stratosphere. Then I remember he’s going to be a Dodger next year regardless, and a little piece of me dies.

12. There is a world where Ryan Vogelsong is not a piece of hot garbage who makes us all sad. I’m not sure it’s this world, though.

13. Angel Pagan’s salute has a (kind of boring) Twitter account. Might mean nothing, might mean everything.


One Comment leave one →
  1. sid sandwich permalink
    April 14, 2014 3:22 pm

    All we need to remember is, fuck the doggies!!!!

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